The hardest thing for me to shed is being offended. Because of that, I wound up saying something mean to someone a few days ago. I get angry when offended; angry at the person, and angry at me for feeling the need to retaliate.
Nonetheless, and more often than not, I give in to that need. It’s a burning sensation that, apparently, I think can only be doused by lashing back—never physically, but verbally.
I hate when that happens. It shows that I lack the Holy Spirit’s fruit of self-control. It shows that I still relish that old part of me. It’s not something that happens a lot, but whenever it does, it’s one time too many.
It makes me feel unworthy of being called a Christian. I don’t let that feeling linger and fester, though, because I know that the enemy of my soul could use that as a weapon against me. I faithfully go to God and ask for forgiveness.
Speaking of forgiveness, I just realized as I’m writing this, that I haven’t always sought forgiveness from the person whom I’ve retaliated; not so much as even said I’m sorry. That’s got to change too.
And it will. The Holy Spirit hasn’t given up on me. He’s showing me my selfish resistance. He’s showing me the area where total surrender is needed in order for His fruit to blossom.
He’s going to continue to convict me of the need to properly reflect the character of Jesus. I am reminded by the Spirit that my Example was led to a much greater offense than any I’ve encountered. He did not retaliate, nor resist. In fact, He even blessed and asked the Father to forgive those who were killing Him.
Based on His life and death, on the One who is greater than me, I pray to give up my so-called right to not be offended.
xxx
From my favorite Christian writer, Ellen White:
“It is easier to act the part of a martyr than to be patient under provocation and to control a bad temper. Sound religious principles must be brought into the life to repress anger rather than inflame it by giving vent to it.
We feel very angry, but if we control that anger and are not betrayed into expressions of hasty feeling, we will not lose the respect of our brethren or respect for ourselves
The Pattern, Christ Jesus, is our Example. Patience is a heavenly attribute, and Christians must cultivate it. We must not ever keep before us the feeling that we’ve been slighted.
Our feelings will sometimes be deeply hurt, our temper sadly tried, but the sooner we shall forget the cause of this disturbance, the better will it be for us and all connected with us.”